Do We Overshare on Social Media?

Luxury Party and Event planner Mark Niemierko and I were having an interesting debate about ‘over-sharing’ this year and I decided it would make an interesting blog post.

As a blogger, I feel like a bit of a slave to my phone sometimes. Constantly “switched on”.

I wonder if the culture of over-sharing has impacted the way we work, how we live and the way we interact with each other. I’ve spoken about it before.

I’ve been to lunch dates with colleagues so fixated with taking the picture perfect instagram shot, their food went cold before they even sat down to eat it.

Even before social media really took off, it has always bothered me when friends or family go on holiday and continuously update their social media feeds with holiday snaps. (Just be on holiday, put your phone down… Jealous. Clearly. lol! )  I love the opportunity to be ‘fully present’ being on holiday brings. Being “un-contactable’ . I love not checking my Whatsapp or Facebook and just being mindful and immersing myself in the culture and with the person whose undivided attention I have.

We frequently go to opposite extremes on wedding days; from couples asking guests to be unplugged, present and turn off their electronic devices, to couples generating their very own social media hashtag and encouraging guests to share every moment via a live feed.

When I heard of the sad case of a lady who was listening to Pharrell’s “Happy” and felt the need to update her Facebook status to let everyone know she was listening to the song whilst driving and subsequently crashed and died,  I wondered if the growing social media culture had gone a bit out of control.

With people updating and sharing every moment of their personal or professional lives this pressure to continuously have share-able “perfect looking” content on social media affects many of us. 

nubride-uk-wedding-blog-kate-spade-new-york-reader-event-londonPhotography: Kylee Yee Photogragphy

On the flip side, being on social media is relevant. Depending on what you use it for, showing snippets of your life and who you are can be vital to growing an audience and some people simply just enjoy sharing. 

I massively share both personally and professionally. Probably too much.

My role as a digital influencer requires me to do so. But the pressure to be continuously attached to my device does make me feel uncomfortable. Just think; friends, family, businesses, colleagues, competitors, clients, even potential employers are looking at our social media – all the time!

As ever, it’s about balance. But it certainly bears thinking about if we share too much and if the desire to ‘get our social on’ could be tamed or if we could learn more from how high-profile individuals or businesses conduct themselves on social media.

You will notice many A-list celebrities, public figures, brands and businesses who work with high-end clients are very strategic and very limited with how much and the way they share on social media. Some aren’t even on social media at all!  Yet they are still relevant, intriguing and successful. I asked Nu Bride Ambassador, luxury event and party planner to the stars Mark Niemierko to shed some light on his take on adding a little mystery. 

Why is it important to keep a little mystery?

eddiejuddphotographyandniemierkoweddings3Eddie Judd Photography | Niemierko

I think its important to always keep your audience wanting more.  

Look at celebrities.  Are you more interested in Angelina Jolie or Kim Kardashian? 

I so want to know more about Angelina and Brad Pitt… her style, their work choices and much more. Simply as they aren’t on social media nor many interviews.  

Less is always more.  You don’t need to say yes to every press enquiry.  

We’ve always chosen not to show too much of every Niemierko wedding, we rarely show our couples.  

One, because I don’t think our followers are interested in people. I think the design work we do is more interesting to them.  But two, I also want people to look at the weddings I plan and wonder who the Bride and Groom were.  

Keeping an air of mystery is like the early stages of dating someone, you don’t know that person yet but you are intrigued.  So you keep going back for more until you find out the real them, (and then dump them)! 

I very rarely post when I’m out socially or privately.  You’ll be surprised to know I look after Ruby, my niece, sometimes and you won’t know I have over social media.  I’ll have dinner with past couples yet not share. It’s not relevant.  

I find it unusual when I see an industry colleague post about attending a funeral of a loved one. That’s just too personal and private for me for social media. 

I’m not saying I’m perfect at social media, I’ve had a few G&T’s and posted then deleted the next morning. (Nu Bride: No comment lol)  No one’s perfect.  But my advice would be to just think twice about what you are posting.  Consider is it relevant to you making revenue for your business?  If I wasn’t running a business, I wouldn’t be on social media.

I predict in about five years social media will slow down and it’ll be far cooler to not share.  The air of mystery will be back.

Most high-profile clients require Non-Disclosure Agreements: Why might they favour this over the culture of over sharing?

0003-kodemediaandniemierkoKode Media | Niemierko

I’ve found that most of my couples don’t want to be on the photographers website.  They simply find it cheesy.  

We’ve done confidentially agreements due to magazine deals, but not Non-Disclosure Agreements.  My couples trust me and that I ‘get it’.  I know which couples I can talk about and which ones I can’t.  I never need to be told.  I guess that’s a compliment to how personalised the Niemierko service is that my couples know me as much as I know them.

What is the importance of not over sharing details of your personal and business life especially when working with high-profile clients?

rossholkhamandniemierkoweddings2Ross Holkham | Niemierko

One of my biggest competitors is not on social media.  They get a lot of work due to this.  

I have asked myself the question should I leave social media and even have a one page website with a password.   

I’ve chosen not to, as the commercial arm of my business does well from my social media presence, such as my academy, my speaking events and my consultancy work.

What are the implications of over sharing high-profile events on social media?

jeremyennessphotographyandniemierkoweddings2Jeremy Enness | Niemierko

You won’t get booked from couples who are EXCEPTIONALLY private.  It’s why you’ll never see a TV documentary on Niemierko.

Do you think you over-share? Join the conversation!

For further information on Niemierko please visit:

http://niemierko.com/

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